Things I Love + A Few Thoughts on Impulsivity

As I think back on all the seemingly reckless decisions I've made (while I presently plan my next) I find they're the things that I am the proudest of, which I never thought would be the case. I was always wondering why I dropped out of school (I ended up going back) or why I moved to three different cities in a year, or why I couldn't just find a person/place/vocation I loved. Love is a strong word. That I felt comfortable with, I guess, is a better summation of what it was I sought.

Not like mind-bending enchantment, or anything like that. Just something I could do forever. Something that made me seem a bit more stable to the outside world. A feat I've found to be close to impossible if your internal world is amuck. I've found this to be true, but I see others do it all the time, get comfortable somewhere and never leave. And I guess I thought I would do that too. I guess I thought I could, or rather that I should. 

There's a funny thing about should's and that is that they are inherently doomed, not by a magical, mystical force, but by your brain, and also a magical, mystical force. More to the rational tone there is a mental phenomenon called IMP—the Ironic Monitoring Process—which shows the more you should, the less you will. If you're asked to not think about something, or not do something, or if you've imposed these limitations on yourself, like "I should just stay in one place the rest of my life," the more difficult it will become to not think about moving to an island. It's a real thing. Look it up. 

Back to the point, I look back on my gambles and think that younger version of me was really brave and wonder if that same bravado still resides. Pretty sure it does. Hopefully in a more stable, less anxious, and less of a I might die if this doesn't happen way.

And while I don't think the gambles you take should pose any danger to yourself, your finances, or those around you. I do think they are a particularly crucial part to feeling at ease with your own decisions. All of that regretting what you haven't done and whatnot. I have a few, but for the most part I've been committed to intuition, spontaneity, and a bit of discomfort to get where I'm going. 

Speaking of discomfort there's a Taurus super moon (which I can't seem to find in the night sky) tonight accompanying the already spinning retrograde

There's something very satisfying about messy buns. source: Swandive on tumblr

Something about this kitchen makes me really happy. source: Madewell on Instagram

I need to learn to shoot just like this. source: Violeta Minnick on 500px

How I'm feeling right about now. source: LiveLuvCreate

I need all of this. I might have all of it, except the shoes. source: How Do You Wear That

... and this source: Bon

Anything with chocolate and hazelnut is my favorite. I can't wait to make these. source: The Foodie Teen

Oh, man. source: This isn't Happiness

These colors are perfect and this yarn hails from Nashville, all the better. source: Camellia Fiber Company